This Close - Steffany Gretzinger

You're not struggling to hear me, so I'm not striving to be heard.  I am sure the One who made me, is catching every word. 

I would fight for your attention, but Your eyes are fixed on me.  I would reach for Your affection, but You've already given it to me.

It's so easy to think of God as far off, uninterested, busy with bigger things.  His presence, His nearness, is the joy of an omnipresent God.  And if that's all He was that would be enough.  But He wasn't content with that.  God put on flesh/humanity and came to Earth - to be with us, to be one of us, to know us.   Jesus was tempted in all ways.  Jesus knows.  Jesus knows us.  But even that wasn't close enough for God.  Jesus said “Nevertheless I tell you the truth. It is to your advantage that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you; but if I depart, I will send Him to you."  ([[John 16:7]])  God wasn't content to sit in Heaven and watch us.  He wasn't even content to become human and walk with us.  He made a way to live in us through Holy Spirit.

He loves us that much.  We have His attention.  We have His affection.  God is love.  Oh that I would learn to receive it moment by moment. 

No One Ever Cared For Me Like Jesus - Steffany Gretzinger

No one ever cared for me like Jesus.  His faithful hand has held me all this way.  

Some of these songs are fun, some build my faith, some are encouraging.  Then ones like this are almost purely aspirational.  It's so easy and tempting to be jealous of people farther along on their journey with Jesus.  I really fight that and choose to be inspired.  He doesn't play favorites.  Nothing can make Him love me more than He does now and has forever.  The journey now is me learning to love Him more as I see Him more clearly.  

Cared for me - Jesus cares for me.  Like the best of parents, or friends, or even lovers.  He cares for me.  He takes care of me.  That's not in some spiritual, maybe one day in Heaven, or some intangible way.  He surprises me with good things.  He encourages me.  I pray for eyes to see and ears to hear more of His caring.

 

More To Me - Steffany Gretzinger

It's Your company I long to keep, Your presence here the sweetest thing.  

All of the others, they don't matter, You are everything. 

Jesus as our first love.  This whole story of Christianity, humanity, time, history, everything ends up at the wedding feast and Christ and His bride.  Love.  The biggest, boldest love story ever imagined.  It starts here and now.  It starts when any individual makes Jesus Lord and Savior.  We love because He first loved us.  We love Him as we see Him more clearly, as we experience Him lavishing His love on us.  This song can be our only response. 

Remember - Steffany Gretzinger

Jesus the Lamb of God, oh what a Savior.  You took the altar and made it a table. 

The insight in that one line is awesome to me.  The Old Testament was all about the law and the blood sacrifice on the altar.  The New Testament is all about a table of communion where we come together with the ultimate and final sacrifice - Jesus the Lamb of God.  Jesus changed everything.  His sacrifice on the cross was sufficient.  There is nothing we can add to it.  His blood is enough.  (Pretty sure that's in an upcoming song.)  All we can do in return is offer our lives as a living sacrifice, because He is worthy.

Don't let me stay the same.  Only Your love can change me.

This.  This is what I've learned.  It's so important.  I know I've written of this on other songs. But this is the line I hear in my head all the time.  Only Your love can change me.  I cannot change myself.  Understanding that really does stop all striving.  All I can do is surrender to His love and let it change me.  That's why time in His presence is the most important thing.  It doesn't matter where that takes place, only that it does.  Obviously for me it's often in times of worship - either in church or my car or wherever. 

Never Leave - Maverick City Music

You said that You would never leave, and I know that You are here with me.

Is there any greater promise from Jesus than that He would never leave us nor forsake us?  Human loyalty falls so short, but His never will.  When the Footprints poem was so overwhelmingly popular I thought it cheesy.  Now I understand the truth of it.  I don't even know all the times He's carried me.  A friend who sticks closer than a brother.  I'm learning how to be His friend.  

Good and Loved - Travis Green & Steffany Gretzinger

Through your story is My fingerprint.  One thing's for sure, I am your Lord.

If you forget, just lift your head, my banner over you is love.

I can listen to this one over and over.  I am good, you are loved.  I'll listen until there is nothing that makes me think otherwise.  Until it's so engrained no other belief has any room.

You Hold It All Together - Maverick City Music & UpperRoom

God of my present.  God of my future.  You write my story.  You hold it all together.  

Decades ago, I was thinking about the verse that says the universe is upheld by the word of God.  As usual, I thought about the literalness of it.  The universe is upheld...  So I thought about gravity.  Not once in history has gravity stopped.  Not once in history has God's mind wandered and the universe began to fall apart, or gravity fail.  It's a funny yet frightening picture if it did fail.  Ha.  

He holds it all together.  Everything.  The stars in their place.  The planets in their courses.  The seasons.  It all points to Him.  To a good and faithful God.  He put His faithfulness on full display.  And He wrote it in hearts.

Hebrews 1:3  (Jesus) who, being the radiance of His glory and the exact expression of His substance, and upholding all things by the power of His word, through having made the purification of sins, sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high...

Heaven's Secrets - Maverick City Music

You don't let a tear fall.  You collect them all.  And You don't waste our suffering.  You're with us in the rain.

As if Your love wasn't enough, You promised us all of heaven's secrets.  There's nothing You keep from us. 

Another beautiful song.  I've said that if God collects our tears, I have a lake somewhere.  All kinds of tears, sadness, anger, frustration, and yet some of joy and hope.  More than that, this idea that He doesn't waste anything - our hard times, our failures, our suffering - He turns them all to good, He uses it all for His purposes.  It's such a mental battle to believe that on hard days.  Part of the battle is knowing that His kingdom is the real reality, the eternal reality.  This life is a reflection of it at best.  It's enemy territory at worst.  But it's all fading and impermanent.  When I feel alone, I have to know Jesus really is with me.  When I am impatient, I have to know He is my source of patience, I don't have to rely on my own.

Remember - UpperRoom

This is our Savior, look at Him, look at Him.  Our Christ Redeemer, look at Him, look at Him.

Oh just to know You in Your suffering.  Just to get closer than I've ever been. 

We're heading into Easter season.  This song is stunningly powerful for this season.  There's another song titled Remember by Steffany Gretzinger coming up.  Her album came out about a year ago.  They've all helped me go a little deeper into communion, it's more than a ritual we sometimes do at church.  

To know Jesus in His suffering.  Man, I'm not there yet.

The other day I heard a line is worship that was kind of a throw away line, it was about how beautiful Jesus' scars are.  I realized I had never thought about His resurrected body having scars.  It struck me as counterintuitive, why would a resurrected body still have scars instead of being made "perfect"?  How important must those scars be?  In some way we're all Thomas - needing to see and feel those scars to believe.

Hebrews 2:9-11  But we see Jesus, who was made a little lower than the angels, for the suffering of death crowned with glory and honor, that He, by the grace of God, might taste death for everyone.  For it was fitting for Him, for whom are all things and by whom are all things, in bringing many sons to glory, to make the captain of their salvation perfect through sufferings.  For both He who sanctifies and those who are being sanctified are all of one, for which reason He is not ashamed to call them brethren

Fun side note - I was at this service.  I've been going to UpperRoom for well over a year, but sporadically.  This was one of those times I believe God was blessing me with a surprise.  I wasn't really paying any attention to worship starting, and then I heard Dante's voice and thought Hey, I know that voice!  So cool.

Prophesy Your Promise - Jesus Culture

I have found You in the middle of my mess.  You have been there all along.  With open arms and open heart You call me in.  And You didn't hesitate at all. 

When I only see in part I will prophesy Your promise.  I believe You God.  Because You finish what You start,  I will trust You with the process.  I believe You God. 

Fear can go to hell, shame can go there too.  Because I know whose I am, God I belong You.

My only confidence is in God.  It's certainly not in me - I know me.  Ha.  He hasn't let me have confidence in others.  That's tough.  It's not in circumstances - how could it be, they are ever changing.  He's my rock, my firm foundation.  Man it's hard.  

You Keep On Getting Better - Maverick City Music

You have always been patient.  You have always been kind.  You're consistent through the ages.  Oh, what a friend of mine. 

It hit me one night just how patient God has been with me.  Waiting years for me to stop my wandering, my trying things my own way.  And so kind.  Infinite kindness and patience.  He never runs out. 

From glory to glory.  As we gaze on Jesus we see more of His glory and become more like Him.  Day by day.   2 Corinthians 3:18  But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory just as by the Spirit of the Lord.

Temple - Maverick City Music

You are the center of my heart and my soul.  I am a temple.  Holy and worthy - you call me Your home.  

This is a much more recent find for me.  But it follows My Heart Your Home so perfectly.  The first time I heard it it moved me so much.  It opened something in my understanding that I didn't have.

Other than a fresh or new filling of the Holy Spirit, a real understanding of this truth - us being a temple of the living God - would change everything.  It's such a deep revelation.  It affects everything about us.  Of course it would remove sin and bad habits and all that.  But it would absolutely remove all negative ways we view ourselves.  To absolutely know He lives in us.  It cures everything.  And from that, how could it not affect everything around us?  Oh to be so full of God that it spills over.  Rivers of Living Water.  Oh let me not settle for less.

My Heart Your Home - Maverick City Music

 Make my heart Your home.  All that's mine is yours. 

Come on in, take a seat, I made room for You and Me.  Never leave.  Oh Jesus, stay with me. 

I wasn't going to add any new songs to the playlist until I finished the ones already on it.  So I started a new playlist a few weeks ago.  There's just such an abundance of good worship these days.  Temple is a fantastic follow up to this song.  I'll post it tomorrow.

Both songs are about Jesus making us His home, His temple.  I think it's one of those truths that is hard to wrap our heads around.  It's one thing to think, ok Jesus is always WITH me.  It's another to be more aware that the Holy Spirit always dwells IN me.  Jesus, King of Kings, creator of the universe, Lion of Judah, Prince of Peace, He is with me always.  I can hang out with Him, talk with Him, anytime, all the time.  He's my shepherd who guides me, who kills the wolves coming for me.   

I love come on in take a seat, I made room for You and me.  Oh to see this Christian life as this simple.  To spend time, all the time, with my friend Jesus.  No one more full of love and grace and patience for me. 

Thank You - Maverick City Music

If time were to stop, I could never tell it all, words are few, this will have to do.  I just want to thank You.  

I was tempted to write this is a more fun, less serious song.  But few things are more serious than thankfulness.  We enter His presence with praise and thanksgiving.

How do I say I generally do grateful well without sounding boastful?  Shrug.  Laugh.  But I do.  I am always saying thank You to God throughout the day (ok most days) for all the little things.  Then there's all He's done for me - I don't even know where to start without sounding cliche.  I drive Noah to school in the mornings and I try to get in a little prayer with him that's simply thanking Jesus for the weather, for the day, for being with us, for loving us.  And honestly, simple is great.  How different would my outlook be if I spent a week only thanking God and not saying anything else to Him?  What if I thanked Him for the frustrating things?  For the inconveniences?  For all of it?  I better stop typing.  HA!  

The Story I'll Tell - Maverick City Music

Singing, oh my God did not fail.  Oh, it's the story I'll tell.

Believing gets hard when options are few.  When I can't see what You're doing, I know that You're proving You're the God who comes through.

I love how raw this song is.  There are many hard days, weeks, years in my life.  There's nothing fun in uncertainty, loneliness, failing in the same way over and over.  I'm trying to learn how to get my eyes - my thoughts - off of myself and onto Jesus.  But when I can't quite do that, I'm trying to learn to pour it all out to Him.  All my sadness.  All my anger.  All my frustration.  The silent screams in my head when I'm beyond words.  He's big enough.  His infinite love and kindness can absorb it all.  Recently I've had a glimpse, a taste, of what His joy feels like.  And like everything from Him, that one taste has made me hungry to do whatever it takes to have more.  

Love Is A Miracle - Maverick City Music

This is more than religion.  Glad I made my decision.  Hope reversed the curse I was walkin in.  

I remember the Voice that called me.  I remember when my heart said yes.  I will never forget that morning, You were singing over me.

You called me out.  You said that one is mine.  You set me apart for your purpose.

I've mentioned I grew up in a Southern Baptist church.  We started going when I was about five.  I still have the Bible I received when I was baptised at age nine.  The one thing I remember is going and telling our next door neighbors I had received Jesus.  It's been a strange journey.  But, He calls me His.  He goes before me.  And one day I'll fully know the why. 

Hymn Of The Ages - Maverick City Music

And all of the promises, all of the praise, all of your people have sung through the ages.  No matter the season, the song's still the same, great is Your faithfulness, great is Your name.

I loved this idea the first time I heard the song - that all through history there is a thread of praise.  There's always been a song - there will always be a song.

We're all prone to wander, but You're prone to chase.

Don't Tread On Me - We The Kingdom

Oh no, you've done it now, gone against the King, gone against the Crown.  Oh no, you've done it now, time to feel the fire.

Ain't no devil gonna tread on me.  He's choking on the blood that ran down the tree.  Ain't no devil gonna tread on me. 

I don't remember exactly when I first heard this, it was within the last few months, but it really caught my attention.  It was good to feel fed up with Satan.  I'm increasingly fed up with Satan.  I don't generally like to give him too much credit or attention, but he is out to kill, steal from, or destroy me.  So sometimes it's good to take that personally and then remind him of his own defeat.

I absolutely love the chocking on the blood that ran down the tree line.  It hits me every time.  I know there's power in the blood of Jesus - but I also know there's so much more understanding of it that I need. 

I Need A Ghost - Brandon Lake

I am convinced that what the American church collectively needs more than anything is a mass filling of the Holy Spirit.  Without Holy Spirit there can be no internal change and there can be no external signs and wonders.  Both are desperately needed.  Everything Jesus did was by the power of Holy Spirit.  We are to be no different.  If every church that believes in the filling of Holy Spirit simply spent the next few weeks or months pursuing nothing more than a true Pentecost season, it would do more good than the last few decades of teaching and sermons and everything else. 

Graves Into Gardens - Brandon Lake

Oh, there's nothing better than You.

I'm not afraid to show You my weakness.  My failures and falls, Lord you've seen them all, and You still call me friend.

I just love this section of songs.  The energy.  The way they build my faith.

There are so many things we each believe are better to us and for us than God. And then His love and goodness and kindness break through.  His peace and joy start to fill us.  We get glimpses of his kingdom.  And everything else doesn't just pale in comparison - it all fades away.

Revivals In The Air - Dante Bowe

Receiving all that You died to give.  

Let the wind blow, let the tide roll, till the Earth knows You're the God of Love.

Lift your eyes to see, He's better than you dreamed.  Everything you lost, love's returning.  It's just what You do, making all things new.

What if we really received all that Jesus died to give us?  What if we believed God does what He says He does?  Oh if we dared.  Let's dare.

A few months ago I was so very frustrated with God.  I was bringing him my list of things He hasn't done and telling Him how mad and frustrated I was.  I told Him - prove me wrong, prove my doubts wrong.  I think what He's been doing since is changing me instead.  It's a crazy process, an internal process.  It's been a solitary process - just Him and me.  He doesn't let me lean on understanding because I have no understanding.  And that's ok with me.

So this revival that's being spoken of so much, well, it can start with a personal revival.  Holy Spirit can bring it to you personally, and your family and house, and it spreads from there.  Revival doesn't depend on the state of the world, or circumstances, or anything.  It can be our own little cloud that surrounds us.

My Hands Are Open - Josh Baldwin

I want to live in expectation of Your kingdom breaking through.

YES!  There's a phrase in my devotional - apostles of the little things.  And I love that.  I can do the little things.  I can be kind to strangers. I can open doors and I can chat with the postal workers or cashiers.  I can buy lunch or dinner for someone.  All the little things - for and with Jesus.  But I also want to do the greater things Jesus did.  I want to see the lost saved, the sick healed, demons cast out.  I think all the time "the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead dwells in you".  Again, it's not yet...  but I know it's coming.  I live in that expectation. 

Anything Is Possible - Dante Bowe

Every battle You've already won.

There is no weapon that has ever left a mark on You.

There is a Kingdom that's advancing to the speed of light.

This is another one that's fun to sing - on a good day.  On a bad day it can be a challenge.  On a bad day I'm looking at that list of things that still look impossible.  One of those impossibles is my parents' health.  I pray for their healing - physical, mental, all of it.  Dad's alzheimer's is steadily progressing.  Mom has good and bad times, but her mind isn't right either.  And I have a vision of them both totally healed and me having to explain why I sold their house and now we have to find them a new one.  And there's a part of me that has faith for that.  And yet... 

There are hundreds of beliefs about God and healing and all that.  I know He's a God who heals.  I know sickness is never from God.  I believe with all my heart there are cures coming soon for so many things - including Alzheimer's.  Will it be in time?  Don't know.  Can Jesus walk into their room at anytime and simply heal them.  Absolutely. 

And so I sing.  And I trust.  And I worship the God of the impossible. 

Better Than - The Hesslers

I prophesy into tomorrow - we will see the goodness of our God.

It's gonna be better than I could dream.

After the year the world has been through, this might be a very hard time to believe this.  Or maybe we're starting to be at the point where we think things will get better because they can't get worse. 

I tend to be an optimist.  And - Spring is just around the corner.  

Ephesians 3:20-21 Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

Prepare the Way - Bethel Music

We're gonna see Heaven on Earth, come Holy Spirit, awaken your church.  

Awaken your church.  I can't seem to find what I want to say about church.  Is it asleep?  Is it distracted?  Is the term becoming meaningless - like the institution it represents.  Lately, I'm seeing ekklesia used to refer to the body of Christ more.

Jesus used the term ekklesia to refer to His followers.  At the time the ekklesia of ancient Greece was the popular assembly, open to all male citizens as soon as they qualified for citizenship.  It was a secular term, a political term, that had nothing to do with religion. It had to do with being a citizen and all that entailed.  I'm sure there were religious terms He could have used, but didn't.  It was all part of Him getting us to see the Kingdom of God and how it operates. 

Ever Be - Kalley Heiligenthal

Now you're making me like You, clothing me in white, bringing beauty from ashes, for You will have Your bride - free of all her guilt and rid of all her shame, and known by her true name.  And that's why I sing. 

It's such a lovely song to listen to, easy to listen to, and then the lyrics -when you catch them - are so powerful.

Your praise will ever by on my lips.  Oh if that were true.  Imagine all the things I wouldn't say if that were true.  There wouldn't be room for anything that wasn't of love.  Almost nothing in scripture haunts me as much as how He will hold us responsible for everything we say.  I've joked that if I took a vow of silence now, and then lived to over 100, I probably still wouldn't make up for all the ungodly things I've said.  If God is Love - then anything not said in love is ungodly.  It's a standard hard to even think of.